Sunday, May 13, 2012

(Words) The Pomp & Circumstance of 'Insert Name Here' Day.. Lowering 'the expecations' and then turning around & getting mad about it...

I guess I SHOULD start this off by saying Happy Mother's Day. So I will. Happy Mother's Day to all. If you are a Mother, playing the role of Mom, yadda yadda yadda yadda..I'm talking to you. Does this apply to Father's Day too? See the end of the post..

Back to the title of the post though...

" I don't care...It's just one day..." - The correct answer everyone KNOWS they should give AND MEAN for these days. Anyone with any sense anyway. 

"I can't believe.." I just expected more....." "I gave hints after I said I didn't care though..." - What almost ALWAYS ENDS UP HAPPENING when things go awry on these days.. Or just some underlying shade for few DAYS...

I'm probably not alone in this one as being SOMETHING THAT GETS ON MY NERVES. Like NO OTHER. It doesn't matter from WHO EITHER. Child, Woman, Man. Mother. SO. My own kids. Friends. I don't discriminate or tolerate this shit. Especially in regards to 'certain days', 'certain events' and the like. 

Even more cumbersome is the 'built in the excuse' that I or anybody else should 'already know that the person who is saying 'I don't care about....(insert whatever it is)" REALLY DOESN'T MEAN IT AND I SHOULD GO ABOVE AND BEYOND ANYWAY SO THAT THEY CAN FEEL 'SPECIAL'. 

Listen man, we are ADULTS. Adults I say! Times like these are NOT THE OPPORTUNITY to revert back to being a fucking baby who needs to be 'coddled and cajoled' into being 'wanted'. No sir/ma'am. Nobody has time for that. Out here guessing and shit. Then...then.. when folks go through ALL THE TROUBLE TO DO WHAT YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T 'want them to do' and you don't respond with enthusiasm, who is at fault? guessed it.... 

We are...'cause you said "Don't bother..I told you don't go through all of that trouble...You shouldn't have done shit....Told you I didn't care..."

Let SOMETHING 'special' not be done though...-_-? Then we are still at fault... I've seen COUNTLESS NUMBERS OF FOLKS be in the proverbial 'doghouse' because of that. Not like they weren't HEADED THERE ANYWAY 'cause of the aforementioned paragraphs. It is a PRETTY HOPELESS SITUATION. (Insert your cliches here for it..) 

 SO I would like to start with this first. If you want something special done, SAY THAT SHIT. Don't be wishy washy about it. Not that I don't find the fact that you even want it that way ONLY ON THESE PARTICULAR DAYS a little disturbing. I do... just don't play the 'throw the stone/hide the hands' game with it. Just like someone who isn't a ' OVER THE TOP gift giver' shouldn't play that game either. Let it be known where you stand on that issue. I would also like to point out, as I will a few more times in this post, that some of you HAVE IT REALLY GOOD DURING THE COURSE OF THE YEAR SO ALL THESE 'DEMANDS' YOU ARE OUT HERE MAKING ARE PRETTY SILLY.  

Some of you DO HAVE SONS/daughters WHO COME TO SEE ABOUT YOU OR CALL YOU EVERY DAY. Make arrangements for you to be taken care of in lieu of their absence. Stay extended times In addition to him taking care of his own HOME in the manner that you raised him to do so in.

Some of you do have boyfriends, co-parents, husbands, ex-husbands that DO MAKE SURE THAT THE KIDS (and you) are taken care of FAR AND AWAY beyond the call of what are wrongfully considered 'womanly duties. Keeping hot meals (cooked from scratch) on tables, doing what was once considered the woman's role of 'showing up at the school for school functions that DO NOT INVOLVE DISCIPLINE OF THE CHILD and the like IN ADDITION TO THE OTHER 'MANLY RESPONSIBILITIES' THAT HE TAKES ON that you REAP THE BENEFITS FROM. Nothing like saying "I'm gonna be home late..." just to let him know you are SAFE AND THAT'S IT knowing that he can and will handle everything else at home 'cause that is WHAT HE ALREADY DOES... 

So lets' not get out here and get bitter because Sally down the street got the 'makeup for all the shit I don't do during the year' treatment aight? Sally's son/husband/man PROBABLY HAS A LITTLE MORE TIME ON HIS HANDS..ya underdig?

It is pretty much one of the more selfish stances in the World if you REALLY DON'T MEAN IT WHEN YOU SAY 'I don't care'/you get upset when you see others 'getting stuff' when you know you get it YEAR ROUND. ...Especially if you are going to then turn around and succumb to all the 'pressures and the like' from any pomp and circumstance that is being paraded around you by others. You know the:

 'Didn't anyone do XYZ for you?"
'You mean he/she/they didn't take you out/get you to a overpriced dinner/crowded commercialized place/overpriced gift because the stores KNOW THAT YOU ARE 'OBLIGATED TO BUY ON THIS DAY' GIFT? 

Or my that opening salvo of ALL SALVOS....

"JUST WHAT DID HE/SHE/THEY for you today 'cause you know (insert the names) took me XYZ and treated me like a (insert the title here) 

All of that shit is CUTE AS CAN BE. If you can do it, GO DO IT. Every last bit of it. Let me tell you one fucking thing RIGHT NOW THOUGH. 


You are pretty fucking sad.You can't make up for it all in one day. You can't have it made up TO YOU all in one day. You SURELY can't be outchea type upset over material things when you are getting the intangibles that others are YEARNING FOR AND COMPENSATING FOR with the gifts they get throughout the year. Nope. Sorry.

Why would I say it like that? 'Cause that is the only way some of you will hear me. That's why. If I said it nicely, you would come out here with the 'But if...' and all of that shit. I don't want to hear it though...

Who gives a shit if 'such and such went by to see his MOTHER TODAY and took her to XYZ' WHEN I'M (others too) OUT HERE MAKING SURE HIS MOTHER DOESN'T HAVE TO PULL HER TRASH CANS DOWN TO THE CURB every day 'cause his 'right up the street ass doesn't come through to see her?

Who cares if 'such and such' took his girl/baby mother/wife' to WHEREVER HE TOOK HER, TOOK THE KIDS FOR 'ONE DAY', BOUGHT HER A PAIR OF 'WHATEVER HE BOUGHT' OR DID whatever he did WHEN THE OTHER 364 DAYS OF THE YEAR, he doesn't 'help her', doesn't cook, doesn't 'babysit his own kids'*, or pretty much doesn't do make any other sacrifices outchea. 

Who cares if on Christmas, there's a new car sitting out front for 'such and such' EVERY YEAR when you by June, cats are getting put out of their HOUSE AGAIN 'cause bills aren't paid? 

.....Not me... And neither should you. It is being done for show for the most part and in many cases, it is a 'THE MAKEUP CALL'. Which is why you see so many folks in flux the days after. It almost always turns into 'I knew that 'treatment' wouldn't last....' Sure it is nice to do for folks and go above and beyond at times. However, if your normal level of doing is a two an eight level effort will only magnify the two level effort QUICK FAST AND IN A HURRY. Ya'll don't hear me out here though.. Think about it though.

Look, I'm NOT saying 'don't do anything for anybody' on these 'special days'. Nope. What I am saying is, while the days are special, your EVERY DAY LIFE ACTIONS should be indicative of that. That's what I am saying. What I am saying is if you are one of these 'conflicted folks' who KNOWS WHILE YOU MAY NOT GET THE THINGS FROM whomever is in your Life material wise on these commercial days but who gets ALL THE LOVE, SUPPORT, AND THE LIKE FROM THEM THE REST OF THE YEAR don't be sour. Trust me...Those folks who got something today can't 'use what they got' today to replace the voids that are missing MOST TIMES** These are the same folks who are sitting back the REST OF THE YEAR, wishing that their son/daughter DID CALL THEM EVERYDAY, did STAY OUTTA TROUBLE AND NOT CAUSE THEM STRESS, FINANCIAL HARDSHIPS AND EMOTIONAL DISTRESS WITH THEIR BULLSHIT, did come see their kids, did TAKE CARE OF THEIR KIDS, did CHIP AND HELP/TAKE THE FUCK OVER with their kids and all of the other things that they applaud 'you for having in your Life'. Just remember that..

So Happy Mother's Day to everyone out there. Show your mother or the mothers in your lives some love. Try and remember that the OTHER DAYS OF THE YEAR THOUGH and any Mothers out there who didn't get 'the treatment' but gets 'THE TREATMENT' all the rest of the days of the year? Rest easy. Tomorrow, those that care will still be on the job and those that 'faked it' today 'cause the spotlight was on, will be gone. Let folks have today though. 

Which would you rather have? The 'perfect Mother's Day' or the 'there for you all year round' person? I know what I would pick... It's one day. It is just like Valentine's Day to me honestly. You need ONE DAY to remember you LOVE YOUR MOMMA? Or those that are Mother's around you? Word? Oh okay.... 

Oh..I almost forgot what I said at the beginning of the post. @ Father's Day. You know what? It DOES APPLY.  Not because it is 'fair' but because it is TRUE. I mean, if you don't appreciate the VERY FEW MEN OUT HERE ACTING LIKE FATHERS the other 364....There's a problem. Sorry. Ditto if you have told everyone around you that 'All you need is a beer and some quiet time' can't get mad if all you get is...well....SOME BEER AND SOME QUIET TIME. If you want MORE, you need to say it but you PROBABLY WANT TO TAKE IN CONSIDERATION ALL THAT IS DONE FOR YOU DURING THE COURSE OF THE YEAR by those that care. That's all I'm gonna say about that.. I won't be as thinly veiled about that day 'cause it INVOLVES ME. If I want something specific, I'm probably gonna MAKE IT HAPPEN and not wait to see 'if it does happen'. That's just me though...

*You can't babysit your OWN KIDS. They are yours. Oxymoron if there EVER WAS ONE..  

**This is the part where I have to compensate for some of you as your inner hit dog starts to com...I mean lack of reading comprehension begins to come out. I said SOME. Which would be to say that there are people can GIVE and STILL DO THEIR JOB THE REST OF THE YEAR. If you THINK I AM TALKING ABOUT YOU WELL THEN...THAT'S your issue. Not mine..Keep barking though....dawg..