Thursday, December 29, 2011

(Words) On: Viewing folks as 'available' on a Social Network/The bf/gf 'bragger'. How the two begat each other...


This is how I honestly see some of you looking at your followers. Like this shit is Getadickpussy.com or some shit.

























I see (and hear) from MANY MANY PEOPLE on the subject of folks either 'Tweeting/socially networking' like they are available. Many a rant. Many a tweet. Even seen a blog post or two on the subject.


"He/She is on here tweeting like they are single..." - is the most common form of the tweet usually coming from folks who have 'found out their little Twitter/Facebook crush has someone or is married.


Ditto on the subject of folks 'Talking about their significant others' too much on a social network.


 "Why does she (mostly but sometimes he) have to tweet about HIM ALL THE TIME? " - The dudes that want to fuck her basically....

I am going to attempt to 'briefly' talk about each of them as it seems you folks out here can't make up your mind/are a lil clueless or are just straight up idiots.


Being social = being available???

This is what some of you seem to be saying out here. First of all, HOW THE FUCK DOES ONE GET ON A SOCIAL NETWORK AND 'ACT SINGLE'? I mean unless we are on Match.com or some bullshit, I didn't know that ANNOUNCING TO THE WORLD THAT YOU HAVE A MATE in EVERY OTHER TWEET was mandatory out here. I didn't know that folks had to be out 'announcing' shit on THE REGULAR for a certain sect of folks who seem to think that every social setting is an opportunity to 'holler'. What kinda BULLSHIT IS THIS? I'm supposed to know you like me/are catching feelings OVER A GOOD MORNING/interaction OUT THIS BITCH? Get the fuck outta here WITH YOUR EMOTIONALLY AVAILABLE ASS. If you are that easy to...Yet you are the SAME FOLKS OUT HERE SAYING 'Niggas are out here REALLY FALLING IN LOVE ON THE INTERNET THOUGH?" Yeah....Okay. Pot it is good to see you are staying 'Black' as usual...- Kettle.

I mean YOU DO REALIZE THAT THE WHOLE POINT OF BEING ON THE INTERNET IS TO INTERACT WITH FOLKS RIGHT? As in, you actually have to engage in conversation? Now I am not saying cats aren't out here flirting and shit but COTDAMM. Have some perspective about this shit and realize that sometimes, your 'Spidey senses' are off and it is YOUR FAULT. Not the other person.

Now I know that some of you think that when a person SMILES at your awkward looking ass, they are trying to holler but that is VERY HARD TO GAUGE over the Internet. People pass compliments EVERY DAY ON THIS JOINT and I would expect that you take them with 'a grain of salt'. I see that I am wrong though 'cause I have COUNTLESS NUMBER of tweets in my TL every day about someone 'tweeting like they are single'. Do better folks.




"I assumed they were single because they said nice things to me and never talked about their significant other in a good OR BAD WAY. So I just assumed they didn't have one..." - Some of you gumps out here

WRONG!!!!!- Charlie Murphy. Maybe the reason why they don't talk about their 'relationship' is because they don't WANT ANYONE IN THEIR BUSINESS. Maybe...just maybe...they have learned that the more you talk about it, the more folks fuck with it and that people can't talk about what they don't know about. You know...they don't want to give folks ammo. Have you paid attention to just how folks are out here once they find out you are in a relationship? They feel like they can (hell I comment on folks shit all the time in the 'spotlight") comment/dissect/rip apart/try to come between/embarrass folks over every single aspect of it. Why WOULD anyone want to subject themselves to such petty shit? I know I don't. Fuck that.

Or ..or...or maybe..JUST MAYBE NOW...they have figured out that the ONLY TWO PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO WORRY AND DEAL WITH THE RELATIONSHIP ARE...wait for it.... THE TWO PEOPLE INVOLVED!! So they don't have to 'discuss it' with the 'World' or vent to the outside on a public forum. Or even give DAILY UPDATES ON IT...good (Oh my wife/husband/girlfiriend/boyfriend is so sweet 'cause they did....) that can be later be used against them when they give bad updates (That motherfucker...I hate when he/she does....I'm single for the night 'cause.....)


Are there some niggas out here being grimy? OF COURSE THERE ARE! That's all over though. Offline and online. Not saying that. What I am saying is that 'convicting cats' of doing so without proper context is UNWARRANTED like a motherfucker. That's what I am saying. You better start asking questions out here folks. Stop assuming. You'd be surprised what a STRAIGHT QUESTION WILL NET YOU. @ asking a woman or a man if they are 'involved with someone'. Most of the time, even if THEY LIKE YOU THEY WILL TELL YOU FROM THE GATE that they are. I can't believe I even have to type this shit to some of you. Especially those of you who proclaim you are SO SMART. -_-. I digress though.

Oh..and while I am 'up here', all of you folks who like to 'meet up with other folks' under the guise of common interest but YOU REALLY LIKE THE PERSON YOU ARE ASKING TO MEET UP WITH? Stop that shit. You are FAR WORSE THAN THE PERSON YOU SAY  'TWEETS LIKE HE/SHE IS SINGLE" At least they are being themselves. You are being dishonest. You don't want to meet because of your love of music(or whatever the activity in question is.). You want to meet because you want to see that person and your love of...(fill in the blank) I've seen MANY A PERSON GET ALL UP IN A HUFF 'CAUSE THEY MEET A PERSON AT A PLACE THAT SAID PERSON WAS GOING TO ANYWAY only to find out that person is 'taken'. Talking about 'They should have told me that..." Stop it out here. We are all adults. You are setting yourself up to fail.


Another thing that some of you fail to realize is that if YOU SEE THE CHARISMA, THE CHARM, THE WIT and like what you see in pictures, WHAT ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH MAKES YOU THINK YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE WHO IS THE 'FINDER OF GOOD' IN PEOPLE? Do you HONESTLY THINK YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS SEEN THIS? On or offline? Rule of thumb people. If  a person is a 'catch', just know that there are HANDS OUT THERE TRYING TO CATCH 'EM OR THEY HAVE PROBABLY ALREADY BEEN CAUGHT. Stop blaming folks who you are secretly pining after for not 'telling you they weren't available' when they were simply out here being the great person they are..* Which leads us into......





"I hate when (such and such) gets on line and fills my news feed/TL with all that talk about their bf/gf/husband/wife...I wish they would just stop..- You

So some of you asked for it to be 'upfront' and what do you do with that bit of information?

YOU COMPLAIN ABOUT IT. This is another one I always see in my TLs and feeds. These folks are being forthright with the info and what do YOU DO? You bash 'em for it. Can't make up your minds can you?

I would assume that I don't have to 'spell it out' why this takes place now that I have explained the FIRST ISSUE but some of you are dense so here I go.

I feel like the MAIN REASON (there may be others but I am not covering those today) is for the FOLKS I JUST DESCRIBED UP ABOVE. They are effectively cutting people off at the pass. Shit gets tiring as fuck (Which is why I never did/do it) and you sound like a broken record but the point is made. Allegedly:

Come this way because you think I look nice or I am nice and someone is there. You've been warned. 

I know...I know..They may be doing this because there may be some (gasp) insecurities in their relationship as well as nowadays BOTH PARTIES are on the same network. Which is THEIR BUSINESS btw. No relationship is perfect...** It isn't my relationship and I happen to know for a fact theirs is no more perfect than the rest of 'em out here. (Shrugs)

Some folks are appeasing their spouse which again, is their business** @ why they make these proclamations.

Hell, some folks ACTUALLY LIKE THEIR FUCKING SPOUSE AND ARE TELLING THE TRUTH. Just because you 'hate' that fool you chose doesn't mean it applies to everyone. Ever think of that? Anybody in any type of REAL COMMITTED relationship knows better than to put its contents all the way out there. You may ALWAYS love that person but there are some days that you don't 'like them at all' and that is okay. Putting it out there play by play though is NOT THE MOVE and they don't do that. That's just common sense. Who wants to have 'Just the other day you said you would do anything for your baby now it is 'Fuck her'" thrown back in their face? Not anyone with any type of common sense so you DON'T PUT EITHER ONE OF THEM OUT THERE TO BE SEEN. You keep it to yourself or your TRUSTED FOLKS. Not the whole Internet.

Some folks don't get on Twitter and Facebook to BE HARASSED DAILY by 'hollers' so they use it to fend them off FOR THEMSELVES. That's right. Some folks actually don't like the attention or know that NO GOOD CAN COME FROM IT.  Some folks are out here fighting the 'good fight' and it is the only way they know how to fight it.***

So you see, despite the fact that you think they are 'trying to annoy you and everyone else', folks usually do have a reason for doing this. Some of those reasons are caused by people LIKE YOURSELF. On both sides of the fence.


Now I am willing to bet that some of you had not drawn the parallels of the two sides of these two issues because you never stopped to think about the 'why' or the 'cause' of them. I personally think BOTH WAYS OF THINKING ARE PRETTY STUPID. I mean unless a person is out here asking you OUT on dates and shit, I don't see how one can LOGIC LEAP THAT FAR. I don't see how this could be 'so upsetting' that I would have to tweet about it, day in and day out. That's your OWN FAULT IMO. ****  Get a clue. Get a life. Keep it moving. Shit.

One shouldn't have to change being an outgoing and engaging person because you 'might end up liking them' in that way. FOH. Control your hormones PEOPLE dammit. Or deal with whatever comes with it when you find out their situation is 'different' than you had it made up to be in that pretty lil head of yours.***** Some folks aren't out here trying to broadcast their day to day relationship status JUST IN CASE you might wanna holler. 

I will say this though. Some of you people who pride yourself in being 'so smart' need to get a FUCKING CLUE. The context clues are there. You are either really stupid OR YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE THEM. (My money is on the latter actually...Easier to say 'He/she didn't come out and say it so it is THEIR FAULT....Sure you're right..- Barry White..) If you TRULY ARE CLUELESS then like I said..Smarten up Nas. I mean folks give you JUST ENOUGH TO LET YOU KNOW THERE IS SOMEONE IN THEIR LIFE even when it is not their 'job' to do it. Trust me. 


It is because of folks like YOURSELF that you (and the rest of us) have to ENDURE the relentless 'My bf/gf/wife/husband this....my (insert title) that...'....They feel like THEY HAVE TO DO IT less they be made out to be some 'monster who is out here leading folks on' and shit. They have probably been 'guilted' into talking about them just to have some fashion all the time for simply....well...just being themselves. Now if that isn't some bullshit to have to do...I don't know what is. 





Remember this please the next time you see that 'nice looking person' in their avi who always tweets/facebook's you back in the morning. Sometimes, it is just that. Them speaking and you responding. Please social network responsibly out here folks...





*If and when you do tell them though....More on that in another post. At another time.. 




**You folks slay me with not wanting to talk about 'what isn't perfect' in a relationship either like INSECURITY isn't the BIGGEST ONE. What the fuck you think folks are talking about? Leaving toilet seats up and cabinets open as being the 'biggest issues'? Issues are things like 'bad money management', infidelity, trust issues, insecurities, low self esteem, lack of communication, stubbornness, not compromising and shit like that. I hear all of you out here saying you 'wouldn't deal with shit like that' which is COOL BUT LETS KEEP IT FUNKY. These (and many more) are THE ISSUES that make relationships not perfect. Not..I like Jay-Z and she likes Nas..." Fuck on with that Joni Loves Chachi bullshit... @ petty ass problems.

*** They will learn that in time, if someone is going to approach them that no amount of preemptive ground work is going to persuade that person not to. It is life. Some folks are determined. The key is having the person you are with realize that too. lol 'Cause it can be hell if they don't or if they are in denial about the folks who approach them on the daily (even though they do 'nothing to provoke it'. )

****Which is funny considering there is an article making its way around 'Black Twitter' today about 'emotionally unavailable folks' and I blame them for it. Funny in an ironic way I can admit. I see this as being 'different' 'cause there is TRULY NO EFFORT BEING MADE BY THE PERSON BEING PURSUED. It is all a stretch by the person who is interested.


***** Lets keep it FUNKY ONCE AGAIN. If you like the person, you are GOING TO DEAL WITH 'WHATEVER IT IS YOU FIND OUT' AND IF YOU AREN'T THEN THERE IS NO HARM NO FOUL. Either way, life goes on. Either you find out they have someone and you are gonna stick around to see what it is (like COUNTLESS NUMBER OF PEOPLE HAVE DONE SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME) OR you are gonna say 'Fuck it...NEXT PERSON'. That's all there is to it.